Christian Nation / Kookiness / religion · February 6, 2007

Ted Haggard says, “I’m not gay, and that ‘Mike Jones thing’ was just a … thing, ya know”

Well, Ted Haggard has been cured of “Teh Gay.” From the Denver Post:

The Rev. Ted Haggard emerged from three weeks of intensive counseling convinced he is “completely heterosexual” and told an oversight board that his sexual contact with men was limited to his accuser.

That is according to one of the disgraced pastor’s overseers, who on Monday revealed new details about where Haggard has been and where he is headed.

Haggard, 50, resigned as president of the National Association of Evangelicals and was fired from the church he built from nothing into a 14,000-member congregation after a former male prostitute in Denver alleged a three-year cash-for-sex relationship.

Haggard admitted to “sexual immorality” and a long battle against feelings contrary to his beliefs. He admitted buying methamphetamine but said he never used it. Haggard did not respond to interview requests.

Among other things, the overseers urged Haggard to enter a 12-step program for sexual addiction, Ware said.

Heh. So, it wasn’t really homosexuality at all, you see – not even bi-sexual. He just had an ‘addiction’ to sex and paid for a male (as opposed to female) prostitute.

Hm. He bought Meth and never used it. Doesn’t this sound like, “Yes I used Pot, but I never inhaled?”

And oh, great – now Ted wants to get a degree in psychology. That’s all this country needs, a shadier, dirtier, more arrogant version of James Dobson.