LGBT · October 22, 2008

A Halloween story about those Scary Gay People

Whenever I hear about “The Gay Agenda” from some religious conservative (always capitalized) I always pull up this image of sharp dressed people (with colorful power ties) around an antique table in some tastefully decorated boardroom.

Well, back in 1987, Michael Swift wrote about this supposed agenda. Very flowery phrases too. He says things like:

We shall sodomize your sons, emblems of your feeble masculinity, of your shallow dreams and vulgar lies. We shall seduce them in your schools, in your dormitories, in your gymnasiums, in your locker rooms, in your sports arenas, in your seminaries, in your youth groups, in your movie theater bathrooms, in your army bunkhouses, in your truck stops, in your all male clubs, in your houses of Congress, wherever men are with men together. Your sons shall become our minions and do our bidding. They will be recast in our image. They will come to crave and adore us.

All laws banning homosexual activity will be revoked. Instead, legislation shall be passed which engenders love between men.

All homosexuals must stand together as brothers; we must be united artistically, philosophically, socially, politically and financially. We will triumph only when we present a common face to the vicious heterosexual enemy.

There’s a lot more to this, first published in Boston’s “Gay Community News” in Feb. of 1987. And if you think it is satire, you’d be right.  I think that Michael might have been borrowing from his namesake, Jonathan Swift when he wrote this.  As published, it starts with one line that shows it to be satire:

This essay is an outré, madness, a tragic, cruel fantasy, an eruption of inner rage, on how the oppressed desperately dream of being the oppressor.

So it was supposed to be funny.  But what is sadly not funny, is that the religious right has taken this essay and used it as their own template of the “Gay Agenda”.  Groups like the American Family Association and American’s for Truth use this essay to frighten their followers with those Scary Gay People.

Oooga booga boo!  They’re gonna get you too!